


At the Pleasure of the President

by westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist



Category: The West Wing
Genre: F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-03-18
Updated: 2005-03-18
Packaged: 2019-05-30 22:57:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15106535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist/pseuds/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist
Summary: The President forces the Senior Staff to attend his Halloween party dressed in costumes he has assigned to them.





	At the Pleasure of the President

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

**At the Pleasure of the President**

**by: Steph**

**Character(s):** Ensemble  
**Category(s):** General/Humor  
**Rating:** YTEEN  
**Disclaimer:** "The West Wing" and its characters do not belong to me. They belong to Aaron Sorkin, NBC, et al. This is just for fun out of a love for the show. No profit is made and no infringement is intended.  
**Summary:** The President forces the Senior Staff to attend his Halloween party dressed in costumes he has assigned to them.   


President Josiah Bartlet stood in front of his Senior Staff, as he concluded that morning's meeting. The group was just about to disperse, when the President's voice halted them. 

"Just one more thing before you leave. You will all be joining me tomorrow night at a Halloween party that the Mrs. and I are hosting at the residence. I look forward to seeing you all then." 

CJ Cregg, Leo McGarry, Toby Ziegler, Sam Seaborn and Josh Lyman all reacted with surprise. This was the first they'd heard about a party. CJ spoke first. "Sir, didn't you mean to say that we are all invited to the party tomorrow and you'll be happy to see us if we are able to attend?" 

"No, CJ, I didn't." 

"But, sir-..." Toby began. 

"Don't 'but sir' me, Toby. You are all coming...It'll be fun." 

Toby sighed and grumbled, "No, sir, fun would be handing toothbrushes out to the brats and then watching their sad little faces, just like I do every year...Now that's fun, that's tradition." 

The President smiled slightly and then shook his head at Toby, "As persuasive as that argument was, Toby, you're still coming." 

Toby rolled his eyes and rubbed at the back of his neck. Sam spoke next. 

"With all due respect, sir, don't you find it a little hypocritical of you to accept the title as leader of the free world and then order us to attend a Halloween party?" Sam inquired. 

"No, Sam, I don't. Do you?" 

Sam shook his head uncomfortably. "No, no, I was just asking if you did." 

It was Leo's turn to speak. "Sir, it is unfair of you to demand that we attend a party that is not work related." 

President Bartlet smiled at him. "It is unfair of me to force you to respond enthusiastically about my making chili, yet I did it anyway, Leo...I'm President, so I can...It's one of the perks." 

Josh gestured to the President that he wished to speak. "Yes, Josh." 

"Sir, maybe you've forgotten that I do not partake in Halloween festivities, so I'm afraid I must decline." Josh spoke, his head down. 

"Tell me again why you shun the holiday, Josh." The President asked, a small smile pulling at his lips. 

Groans spread throughout the room, as the group lamented the fact that they'd have to hear this story again. 

"Well, sir, it was my seventh Halloween and-..." Josh began. 

Toby sighed loudly. "If I am forced to listen to this idiotic story one more time, I will not be held responsible for my actions." 

The President threw Toby a warning look and then gestured to Josh to continue. "It was my seventh Halloween and I was invited to a party at my friend Timmy's house. I went as a ghost-..." 

Josh paused momentarily as he heard Sam's whispered comment to CJ, "The originality of that costume strikes me every time." 

Josh then continued, but not before rewarding Sam with a glare. "I went as a ghost, a classic costume might I add. Anyway, I was having a grand time, until it was time to hit the Piñata. The third person to hit it was Billy Hert, this gigantic moose of a seven year old. Well, he went to swing and he hit it really hard. The Piñata then hit me in the head, knocked me off my chair and sent me flying headfirst into the apple bobbing bowl. I chipped a tooth when my mouth hit an apple and was *this close* to having a concussion from the Piñata impact...After that, I swore off all Halloween parties." 

Sam pretended to sniffle and placed a dramatic hand to his chest. "That story always gets me right here." 

CJ, Leo, Toby and the President tried to contain their laughter at Sam's antics, while Josh tried to control his urge to strangle him. 

He responded with thinly veiled embarrassment. "Laugh if you like, but I can't look at an apple without thinking of that night and I don't do too well around stuffed animals either." 

The group chuckled lightly at Josh, who proceeded to blush. The President spoke next. "Tragic as your story is, Josh, I feel that it is time you overcame your fear. And what better time to do that than my party tomorrow." 

"But, sir, I-..." Josh started. 

"No more buts about it. If you are all not there tomorrow, then I will personally subject each one of you to a two hour lecture on the history of Candy Corn on Monday," the President threatened. 

Each staff member mumbled a reluctant "I'll be there." 

The President smiled. "Now that's the spirit. Make sure you pass the word around to your staffs. Also, on your way out, pick up a sheet from Mrs. Landingham telling you which costume you've been assigned." 

The mouths of the staff once again fell open. Leo spoke. "Sir, I'm afraid that you have just gone too far. Now you're telling us what to wear?" 

"It appears that way, doesn't it, Leo? I feel that I must. If I didn't, then you'd all probably show up in work attire and say you were pretending to be compliant, serving at the pleasure of the President staff members...And that would just be too much of a stretch, now wouldn't it?" 

A few hesitant and muffled "Yes, sirs" were said in response. 

"Dismissed," the President said with a wave of his hand and a smile upon his face. 

The disgruntled staff members slowly made their way out of the office and over to Mrs. Landingham. She handed them each a piece of paper. Five pairs of eyes widened almost simultaneously as they read their costume assignments. 

"A clown!" Toby yelled. 

"A crayon!" CJ exclaimed. 

"Robin Hood!" Sam screamed. 

"A puppy!" Leo grumbled. 

"An apple!" Josh lamented. 

They all sighed in exasperation. Leo shook his head. "Never let it be said that that man does not have a sense of humor...A strange one, but one nonetheless." 

*************** 

The next day, Donna Moss hurriedly caught up to her boss, Josh's side. She began talking quickly, as if he'd been involved in a conversation with her for some time. "...So I went to the store to buy my Halloween costume and this woman tried to buy the one that I wanted. It was the last one and it was my size. It *definitely* was not her size. We were practically fighting over it and-..." 

Josh halted her ramble with a hand held up. "Is there a point anywhere in this incoherent mess?" 

Donna shook her head. "No. Must I always have a point?" 

Josh shrugged, while grinning. "Nah, why start now?" 

Donna rewarded him with a light swat on the arm, as she tried to keep up with the quick pace he'd resumed. When she was finally dead even with him, she held her hands out in front of him, displaying her fingernails brightly painted with red nail polish. 

"Josh, can you tell the difference between these two nail polishes?" 

Josh glanced at her nails quickly, before turning to her with a look of absurdity. 

"Donna, can you tell from the expression on my face that I couldn't care less?" 

Donna briefly surveyed his face, before nodding. "Yes, I can." 

"Then why are you still here with your nails talking to me?" 

"Because I value your opinion." 

"No, you don't." 

"Starting now, I value your opinion." 

Josh stopped walking for a second and looked at Donna. "I am a very busy man, Donna. I make decisions every day that affect people's lives. Some people around here even value my opinion. Now, do you understand that asking me a stupid question about nail polish may be just a tiny waste of my invaluable time?" 

Donna shook her head, as she began walking with Josh again. "No, I don't understand that, Josh...I need to know which one is better, it's for my costume tonight. Come on, I always offer my opinion on stuff for you." 

Josh nodded. "Yes, yes you do. You always offer your unsolicited opinion to me." 

"See? So why can't you help me for once?" 

"Because I don't care." 

"But I care that your Friday tie is ugly and doesn't match your suit." 

Josh paused, realizing it was Friday. He looked down at his tie and picked it up for a second. 

"You think my Friday tie is ugly?" 

"Yes, I do." 

"Why didn't you ever tell me? 

"You never asked." 

"That never stopped you before," Josh replied with a small grin. 

Donna sighed and then a tiny smile pulled at her lips. "If you don't help me then I am going to repeatedly remind you of the fact that you will be wearing an apple costume tonight." 

"Donna, you know of my dislike for apples...Now I am going to look ridiculous while dressed up as one...Isn't that enough torture for one day?" Josh replied. 

Donna laughed. "Oh please, it's such an absurd fear...I mean, a fear of apples?...Really, Josh." 

Josh held a warning finger up to her. "There is no fear, Donna...No fear...I am just not particularly fond of apples, that's all." 

Donna laughed and nodded. "It's still absurd." 

Josh dropped his head and mumbled his response. "Hey, you weren't there...It...it was traumatic." 

With one last laugh, Donna turned on her heel and was about to head in the opposite direction, when Josh's voice halted her. She turned back around to face him. He asked his question, a certain amount of embarrassment present in his voice. "So...What..um...costume are you going to be wearing that you need to have such a bright nail polish for?" 

Donna smiled at him. "A belly dancer costume." 

Josh's mouth fell open slightly and he had to raise a hand to the wall to steady himself. He stammered. "A bel...Wow, that...that sounds nice...Really good...You might be a little cold...But good...Okay...I have work to do...Work...Work to do...Okay, I'll be going now." 

Donna grinned, as Josh turned to his left and practically walked into the wall. He smiled awkwardly at her and then pointed down the hall. "That's a wall...I have to go that way." 

Donna nodded at him and then smiled to herself, as she watched his retreating figure. 

******* 

Toby sat in his office reading over Sam's first draft of the speech the President was to deliver to the fourth grade class at Lincoln Elementary School on Monday. The President had decided that every year he would speak to an elementary school, so that children could develop an interest in their country at a young age. 

Unfortunately for Sam, Toby was in an even more unpleasant mood than usual, due to the fact that he was being forced to wear a clown costume to the party that night. 

Toby mumbled to himself, as he finished reading a line "This is no good. What was he thinking?!" 

An irritated Toby looked up when he heard a knock on his door. Sam stood in the doorway, a smile upon his face. "So, how do you like the speech?" 

Toby gestured to him to enter. "Oh good, you're here. I can yell at you now instead of later." 

Sam's face fell, as he took his seat in front of him. "Must you yell? I've always responded better to criticism delivered in a soft voice with a smile." 

Toby's hard eyes stared him down. "Yes, I must yell. Yelling makes me feel better about *you*. Yelling helps me stop myself from beating *you* to a pulp." 

Sam managed a weak smile. "Do as you must." 

Toby shook his head and pointed to a sentence in the first paragraph. "Tell me, Sam. Does the average fourth grader understand the word 'gregarious'?" 

"I did." 

"I said average. You memorized the dictionary by the age of two." 

Sam nodded. "Okay, I'll change it." 

Toby shook his head once again, a grimace upon his face. "Is it really necessary to have the President comment that ' "Pokemon:The Movie" was a very fine piece of film making'?" 

"It demonstrates a bridging of a generation gap on his part." 

"It demonstrates an intelligence gap on your part." Toby responded bluntly. 

"I see nothing wrong with it." Sam countered. 

"Nothing wrong with it? Sam, you want the President to say and I quote 'Pikachu is a classic heroic character'. I see many things wrong with it...Many." 

Sam sighed and shifted in his seat beneath Toby's glare. Toby continued. "First, may I inquire as to how you know so much about Pokemon?" 

"I took my nephew to see it." 

Toby smiled insincerely at him. "Heartwarming...Okay, besides the fact that Pokemon has nothing whatsoever to do with this nation, there is another reason that the President will not be saying one word about Pikachu and his compadres." 

"And what would that be, Toby?" 

Toby rolled his eyes in annoyance at Sam, his face reddening. "Because the President has absolutely no idea who Pikachu is! If you mentioned the word 'Pikachu' to the him, he'd respond with 'God bless you' and continue on his way!" 

Sam moved forward in his seat and tried to smile at him. "Toby, would you like me to remove the Pokemon parts?" 

Toby spoke through clenched teeth. "No, no, Sam, I wouldn't. In fact, from now on I would like you to include references to Pokemon in every speech for the President." 

"I'll fix it," Sam replied, barely hiding his displeasure at Toby's sarcasm. 

Sam leaned back in his chair and studied Toby, who was still reading the draft. As he continued to peruse him, he let a small chuckle escape. 

Toby looked up at him with suspicious eyes. "What? What was that laugh for?" 

Sam feigned ignorance. "Laugh? What laugh? I didn't laugh." 

Toby slowly lowered his eyes back to the paper. Sam continued to watch Toby and then let another laugh, this time louder, escape from his lips. 

Toby through his pen down and looked at Sam with agitation clearly sketched across his face. "What are you laughing about? You know I could be laughing now, too. I could be laughing at the fact that you have an amazing grasp of the English language, yet absolutely no idea how to express it in your writing...But I'm not. I'm not laughing. Do you know why I am not laughing, Sam? Because I don't laugh." 

Sam did his best to hide his irritation at the insult. He grinned at him. "I apologize. I was simply trying to picture you, Toby Ziegler, the closest living thing to a statue that I've ever met, in a clown costume. Come on, give it a try...Picture it...Guaranteed to cure that inability to laugh." 

Toby's face hardened at Sam, but then he managed a small grin. "The only thing that could make me laugh is picturing you in your Robin Hood costume. I'm sure those tights will accentuate your chicken legs nicely." 

Sam's face fell. "Chicken legs?! I happen to have very nice, shapely legs, Toby." 

Toby looked down at his work and responded without looking up. "I've seen you in shorts, Sam...There was a whole group of baby chicks lined up behind you last time." 

Sam stood up and stammered for an appropriate rebuttal. "Well, you...you are...you're just-..." 

Unable to think of anything, Sam turned around and left the room in frustration. 

Toby smiled and spoke to himself. "Yeah, that grasp of the English language never ceases to amaze." 

************** 

CJ was sitting in front of her laptop busily typing, when she heard a knock on her open door. She responded without acknowledging the visitor. 

"Go away." 

"It's me, CJ." Danny's voice responded. 

"In that case, go away now." 

Danny grinned, as he leaned on the frame of her door. 

"I've always liked red." 

CJ briefly glanced at him in curiosity before turning back to her work. "I am working, Danny. I really don't have any interest in discussing your favorite color and my favorite food." 

"Moo Goo Gai Pan." 

CJ turned to him, a smile pulling at her lips. "How did you...No, never mind, I don't care." 

Danny smiled at her. "Blue's my favorite color, not red." 

"Not that I care, but you just said you like red." CJ responded. 

"As a crayon color...I've always found it to be very sexy." Danny's eyes focused on her, waiting for the look he knew he was about to receive. 

CJ took her eyeglasses off and shook her head at him. "How did you find out about that?" 

Danny grinned. "The President is very fond of me." 

"He didn't inv-.." 

Danny smiled widely at her. "Fond enough to invite me to his Halloween party tonight." 

CJ placed a hand to her forehead. "Oh God." 

"So I was thinking of going as a Burnt Sienna, what do you think?" 

CJ raised a warning finger up to him. "No, Danny, don't. Do not wear the same costume as I am." 

"I'm not...I'm going as a Burnt Sienna, you have at least 63 other colors at your disposal." 

CJ bent her head, as she shook it back and forth. Danny watched her with a smile and then said. "But I'd go with the Red if I were you." 

With that, he left the room. CJ sighed and fell back in her chair. 

************* 

Leo sat in the President's office, briefing him on the day's events. "Josh is meeting with Senator Potter to discuss-..." 

Leo's sentence was interrupted by the President. "Leo, have you gotten your costume for tonight yet?" 

Leo shook his head at him. "Sir, with all due respect, I don't think you should be thinking about my attire for tonight and I do think you should be listening to what I am saying." 

The President waved a dismissive hand. "Ah, it's always the same stuff, Leo. Josh this, Toby that. They'll be in here soon enough telling me everything that went wrong with what they were supposed to be doing anyway...It's Halloween, loosen up." 

"Mr. President, you know that I've never been a big fan of this holiday or any other for that matter." Leo responded. 

Yes, Leo, I do...And I've always thought that to be one of your biggest flaws." 

Leo shrugged, as the President continued. "So, did you get your costume or not?" 

Leo looked at him, with annoyance in his eyes that he was unable to hide. "No, I did not. A puppy, sir? Come on." 

President Bartlet smiled. "Aw, I think you'll look cute. It'll soften that cantankerous attitude you've mastered so well." 

Leo smiled slightly. "Actually, I think it'll only serve to enhance it." 

The President grinned. "As long as you wear it, I don't care what it does." 

"But a puppy? I-..." 

"What's the matter, Leo? You are housebroken, aren't you?" The President asked with a well-hidden smile. 

Leo nodded at him. "That's very funny, sir. You are a very humorous man." 

"So I've been told." 

"But don't you think that it is the least bit irresponsible of you to use your power in order to force your staff to do as you please, purely for the benefit of entertaining yourself?" Leo asked. 

The President smiled widely at him. "Yes, Leo, I do....And I love the fact that I can." 

Leo shook his head in defeat, a small smile on his lips. 

************* 

Since the Senior Staff members had to work late, their costumes were delivered directly to their offices. 

C.J. now stood outside of Toby's office, banging on the door in frustration. "Toby! Open the door! The party is starting soon!" 

From behind the door, came Toby's response. "No! I am not going out there looking like a reject from the Barnum and Bailey Circus." 

C.J. sighed, shaking her head. "I'm sure it's not as bad as you think." 

Toby grumbled, as he surveyed his appearance in the mirror hanging on the closet door in his office. "It's worse than I think." 

C.J. banged her fist against the door again, as she finally lost her patience. "If you want sympathy, then you've got the wrong gal! I am standing here with the word 'CRAYOLA' written all the way down my body, for heaven's sake!" 

Toby smirked, as he suddenly felt the urge to see C.J. in her crayon costume. He walked over to the door and slowly opened it up. The laugh that was seldom heard, erupted from his mouth as he took her in. 

C.J. had on a bright red foam costume that encircled her thin body. The word 'CRAYOLA' was written down it in big, bold black letters. Atop her head, sat a pointy red hat that served as the tip of the crayon...She had never looked or felt more ridiculous in her life. 

A scowl immediately appeared on C.J.'s face, as Toby struggled to stifle his laughter. He managed an insincere, "You...look...nice. Are you supposed to be a fire hydrant?" 

Toby quickly tried to close the door, but C.J. stuck her foot in between it and the frame to prevent him from doing so. She then forced the door open and perused him as he had done to her. 

It was C.J.'s turn to almost double over in laughter. 

Toby was wearing a cotton jumper, with multicolored polka dots on a yellow background. Four big red pompoms ran down his chest and a white ruffled collar surrounded his neck. On his feet he wore enormous, red plastic shoes. A curly pink wig sat atop his head and a red rubber nose was at the center of his face. 

Toby rolled his eyes in agitation at C.J., his arms folded across his chest and his lips curled into a frown. "C.J., this is NOT funny...This is in no way funny!" 

C.J. took a deep breath and smiled. "Oh yes, it is. On a list of 'Top Ten Funny Things', this would be number one." 

"Oh, I am so glad that you are amused at my expense...I should have expected as much." 

C.J. sighed. "Why is it okay for you to laugh at me, but not me at you?" 

"Because I don't respond well to ridicule." Toby replied. 

C.J. laughed. "Well, you better get used to it...You're a walking target tonight." 

Toby growled at C.J., but she continued anyway. "Although, you'd be a better target and a better clown with a little make-up." 

Toby's eyes widened and he held his hands up as if in defense. "Back off or my big floppy feet will stomp you into a million wax pieces." 

C.J. smiled and shook her head at him. "Lighten up, Toby. Everybody is going to look ridiculous...We'll all look ridiculous together." 

Toby mumbled his reply. "I hate nothing more than the thought of looking ridiculous with all of you." 

C.J. smiled, as she shoved Toby out the door. 

* * * * * 

Down the hall, Mallory was busy helping her father, Leo, into the rest of his costume. She smiled at him. "Oh, you look so cute, Dad." 

Leo rolled his eyes at his daughter. "Mal, if you use the word 'cute' one more time when referring to me, I swear I'll cut you out of my will." 

Mallory grinned and then stood back, taking in his appearance. Leo was dressed head to toe in light brown fur, with a white belly at his center. His head was covered with brown fur and large, floppy ears hung down close to his shoulders. His hands were also gloved in white fur and now resembled paws...He would have looked like a cuddly puppy, except for the near permanent scowl now upon his face. 

Mallory walked up to him and petted his head. "You be a good puppy tonight, okay?" 

Leo smiled insincerely. "Being only a puppy and all, I'm afraid I might not be able to stop my jaws from somehow finding the leg of a certain tights-clad staffer." 

Mallory's eyes narrowed at her father. "Dad, you better leave Sam alone tonight." 

Leo feigned innocence. "Who said anything about, Sam? My what a suspicious mind you have...You must have gotten that from your mother." 

Mallory smiled at her father. "Yes, I must have. And you should know a little something about puppies already, seeing as you've spent so much time in the doghouse." 

Leo shook his head, a smile on his lips. "Look at the way she talks to her father." 

Leo turned around and looked at himself in the mirror. "And look at how the President repays me for all of my loyal service...All of the years of friendship and advice I've given him...All of the time I spent getting him elected into office...All of that and *this* is my reward." 

Mallory laughed, as she placed a hand on her father's shoulder. "Oh stop being so dramatic, Dad...It wouldn't kill you to learn how to have a little fun." 

Leo grinned at her. "You don't know that, it just might." 

Mallory shook her head and walked towards the door. "I'll see you at the party, Dad." 

She left her father's office and walked down the hall, pausing at the open door of Sam's office. She smiled as she watched him. He was standing in front of a mirror that hung on the inside of his closet door. His hands were at his hips and he was posing in the mirror, a smile spread across his lips. Mallory listened carefully when she heard the soft mumble of his voice. 

"Unhand her, you ruffian!...I am Robin Hood!" 

Mallory placed a hand to her mouth, so that Sam would not hear her laughter. She continued to watch and listen to him, as he removed a plastic sword from his side and held it out in front of him. He spoke, his voice rising. 

"You're no match for me!...If it's a duel you want, then it's a duel you'll get!...I am Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves, I never back down from a challenge!" 

Mallory tried desperately to control her laughter, as Sam gracefully swished the sword back and forth. She, however, lost her battle and a rather loud chuckle emerged from her mouth. 

Sam stopped in mid-swish and slowly turned to his side. His gaze fell upon Mallory and his mouth dropped open slightly. His eyes registered the horror he felt. He struggled to find the right words, but instead only came up with, "A fly." 

Mallory's eyes narrowed in confusion. "Excuse me, Sam? Did you say 'a fly'?" 

Sam nodded and spoke nervously. "Yes, yes I did. I...I was trying to kill a fly...with the sword...That's what I was doing...just...just now." 

Mallory smiled at him. "Oh, that's what you were doing. So swords instead of fly swatters are the insect squashers of choice in the White House?" 

Sam shook his head and uttered a soft. "No, my fly swatter's in the shop." 

Mallory laughed, shaking her head. "Sam." 

He slowly relented and nodded. He muttered in an embarrassed tone, "I...I was...I was just getting in character." 

Sam tried to smile, but failed miserably. His face reddened as he realized that his sword was still in mid-air. He slowly lowered it to his side. Mallory grinned widely as she entered the room. "I think that you are more than in character already." 

Sam smiled easily now, a weird sense of pride washing over him. 

Mallory's eyes perused him. He was wearing a brown suede vest, with a thin white shirt beneath it. A skirt-like piece of apparel of the same suede covered his legs to just above the knee and a belt was fastened securely at his waist. His legs wore dark green tights and his feet brown suede shoes. A pointy hat of the same color suede was perched atop his head, a green feather sticking out of it. A brown leather sheath sat at his side, which served to hold his sword. A strap fell across his chest, which held his bow and arrows in place at his back. 

Mallory found the outfit to be strangely sexy and she approached him with that look in her eyes. Sam swallowed hard. "You...You really think I look like Robin Hood?" 

She nodded, as she reached him. Mallory fingered his shirt and ran her index finger down his chest. "Oh yeah." 

Sam nodded, his words emerging awkwardly. "And am I to take this touching of my body to mean you find it sexy?" 

Mallory leaned in and whispered into his ear. "Definitely." 

Sam grinned and nodded. "In that case, this is *definitely* not going back to the rental store." 

Mallory nodded, a small laugh following out of her mouth. "See, now this is nice. You've accepted your costume assignment and tried to have fun with it. Everyone else, my father included, is doing nothing but whine." 

Sam smiled. "In their defense, I got the coolest costume assignment." 

Mallory nodded in agreement, as Sam continued in a ramble. "Although, I was a little wary at first, too. I mean, not every guy can pull off an outfit like this. And then Toby made me feel insecure about my legs...Which I should have expected, since he's bitter about the whole clown thing...and Pokemon, I think...But then I realized that my legs have good definition and-..." 

"Sam," Mallory interrupted him. 

"Yes," Sam replied quickly. 

"Shut up," Mallory stated with a smile. 

"Okay," Sam responded, with a trace of bewilderment in his voice. 

"And kiss me," Mallory demanded in a breathy whisper. 

"Okay," Sam said, a grin creeping onto his face. 

Then he slowly lowered his lips to hers, capturing them in a soft kiss. 

When they parted, he finally noticed her costume. He smiled at her. "A nurse, huh?" 

Mallory smiled. "Yup. You like?" 

Sam nodded, as he took her in. She was wearing a very short white dress, with panty hose and high heels to match. A little white hat sat atop her head and a stethoscope hung around her neck. 

"Oh yeah, I like. And that one's not going back to the store either," he replied enthusiastically. 

Mallory smiled mischievously. "I'm a step ahead of you, Mr. Seaborn...This baby is already bought and paid for." 

Sam grinned in surprise and spoke slowly. "Well, I hope that stethoscope isn't going back either because it could come in handy down the road...You're *already* giving me heart palpitations." 

Mallory laughed, before kissing him again and saying, "Then this costume has *already* paid for itself." 

Sam nodded with a smile and then took Mallory's hand, leading her out of his office. 

* * * * * 

A few doors down, Donna was doing the same thing C.J. had been doing minutes before. 

"Josh! Open the door!" 

"No!" The muffled reply came from behind the door. 

"Joshua!" 

"Donnatella!" 

"The President will not be pleased if you are late!" 

"I have decided that I value my dignity more than this job." Josh replied. 

Donna smiled slightly. "Josh, you lost your dignity the moment I found you lying on the floor with panties around your neck." 

Behind the door, Josh nodded in agreement and then sighed. 

"True, but that was a private humiliation...I prefer my humiliations to be private." 

Donna stomped her foot in frustration. "Joshua Lyman, if you do not open this door this instant, I am going to start singing that song you hate." 

"Please, don't." 

"Then open the door." 

"No." 

"Fine, you leave me no choice...Let's see...How does the chorus go? Oh yeah...'Upside, inside out, she's livin' la vida loca...She'll push and pull you down...Livin' la vida loca...Her lips are-'..." 

"Stop! Just stop, please! I'll open the door, I'll open the door." Josh's irritated voice interjected. 

Donna smiled proudly at herself. Josh finally opened the door and held his index finger up to her. 

"Never, ever do that again." 

"I knew you hated that song." Donna replied. 

"Yes, I do, but that's not why you must never, ever do that again." 

"Then why?" 

"Because I hate your voice." 

"My voice? Why?" Donna's eyes narrowed at him. 

Josh ran a hand along his forehead and closed his eyes as he spoke. 

"Because your voice makes nails on a chalkboard seem like music to my ears, Donna." 

Donna's eyes shone at him, a hint of anger present in them. 

"I happen to have a very nice voice, Joshua. It is not my fault that you have no taste." 

"Oh I have taste. It's my hearing that you damaged." Josh replied sarcastically, with a grin upon his lips. 

Donna rewarded him with a goodhearted slap on the arm, during which she finally noticed his costume. She tried to hold in her laughter, as her eyes surveyed his appearance. It was simple: He wore a huge, red apple-shaped cotton costume, with holes for his legs and arms. 

Donna tried to speak as sincerely as possible. "You look great, Josh." 

Josh looked down at his costume, suddenly aware of how ridiculous he looked. "Nice try, but I know I look like an idiot...I feel like one, too." 

Donna grinned. "It's about time you looked the part." 

Josh threw her an insincere grin. "Well, thank you very much. Your support never fails to overwhelm me, Donna." 

"Well, what did you want me to say? That you don't look like an idiot?" 

Josh shrugged. "I don't know. A 'Josh, I know this is hard for you, but you're the best apple I've ever seen' would've been nice." 

Donna smiled. "Josh, I know this is-..." 

Josh interrupted her with a hand held up. "Too little, too late." 

Donna shrugged and held up the hat she'd been holding. "Here's your stem and leaf cap." 

Josh rolled his eyes. "As if this costume wasn't already embarrassing enough." 

Donna smiled, as she came closer to him. She pulled the elastic string and placed it around his chin. She adjusted the cap so that it sat slightly askew atop head. "Perfect. You're all set." Donna announced, as she stepped back. 

It was during this time that Josh finally noticed her belly dancer costume. Donna looked gorgeous in a gold and purple sequined pants and halter top set. Her finely toned stomach was accentuated nicely, as the pants began just below her navel and the top began just below her breasts. The halter top was quite low-cut, leaving little, but enough, to the imagination. Hanging from her halter top, were strings of faux white pearls that dangled in drapes across her stomach. A crown of gold sequins and white pearls sat atop her head, with a short gauzy gold veil falling over her blonde hair, which had been swept up into a mass of curls. 

Josh swallowed around the lump in his throat, as he absorbed her. Donna spoke, as she twirled in front of him. "So what do you think?" 

Josh was struggling to form a coherent thought, so he blurted out the first thing that came to his mind. 

"'Glisteny'...You look very 'glisteny'." Josh mumbled, while rubbing at the back of his neck. 

"'Glisteny'? That's not even a word, Josh." Donna replied, a trace of disappointment in her voice. 

"Yes, it is." 

"No, it's not, Joshua." 

Josh shrugged, as he forced himself to look away from her. He was suddenly aware of the fact that he was beginning to sweat profusely...And he didn't think it was because of the costume. He tried to speak nonchalantly. 

"Hey, it was compliment." 

"A compliment?" 

"Yes." 

"If that's what you consider a compliment, then I think you need to look the word up in the dictionary." Donna responded. 

Josh sighed, while rubbing at his face. 

"You practically blinded me, Donna. If that's not 'glisteny', then I don't know what is." 

"Fine, I'm 'glisteny, but that still doesn't qualify as a compliment." 

Josh rolled his eyes. "Geez, fishing for compliments...I never expected that of you." 

Donna sighed in defeat, before grabbing his arm and dragging him towards the door. "Oh just forget it...Let's go." 

Josh sighed in relief, as he wiped at his brow. 

* * * * * * 

Josh and Donna met up with Sam and Mallory in the hallway. Mallory and Donna began to talk right away, quickly walking ahead of the guys. Josh and Sam stopped, sizing each other up. 

Sam smiled. "We look good, don't we?" 

"Not gonna work this time, Sam." Josh said, shaking his head. 

Sam shrugged. "Speak for yourself, I look sexy...I already got the 'Mallory seal of approval'." 

Josh sighed. "Well, I look like an idiot...I already got the 'Donna seal of disapproval'." 

Sam looked at him once again and nodded. "Yeah, I've got to go with her on that one." 

Josh threw his hands up in exasperation. "Does anyone around here know how to speak words of comfort?! Anyone?...They don't have to be true, they just have to be comforting!" 

Sam shrugged, placing his hand on Josh's shoulder. "Sorry, buddy. I got nothing." 

"How is that possible? You write speeches for a living...You put words in *other* people's mouths...You're a lawyer, a politician, you lie for a living...How then is it that you have nothing to offer me?" Josh asked in agitation. 

Sam shrugged once again. "It's a mystery to me as well." 

Josh sighed, as the two of them kept walking. He quietly mumbled to himself. "And the worst thing is that she looks incredible and I look idiotic...Kill me now." 

* * * * * * 

Mallory, Sam, Josh and Donna all entered the large formal dining room at the President's residence. It was already filled with quite a few guests. The room was awash in Halloween decorations. Orange and black balloons filled each corner of the room, while streamers of the same color gathered at the center of the ceiling where the chandelier hung. The walls were covered with familiar Halloween pictures, such as witches and ghosts. Small pumpkin lanterns hung from the ceiling, giving the room a strange, but comfortable glow. 

Sam and Josh's eyes lit up when they spotted Toby and C.J. across the room. They were standing near the buffet table. Sam and Josh left the women and hurriedly walked over to their friends and colleagues. Toby and C.J.'s backs were turned to them, so they were about to be ambushed. 

Sam spoke first. "Ah, if it isn't Bozo, the Clown, and his sidekick, Scarlet the Stick." 

Josh smiled, as Toby and C.J. scowled at Sam. Josh spoke next. "Hey, Toby, I love what you've done with your hair. It really complements your frown. And, C.J, what an exquisite hat. Where did you get it?" 

C.J. and Toby laughed sarcastically at them both. Toby spoke through his insincere laugh. "Oh, you two are funny...Very funny, especially for two people who look like a bird in tights and a bloated tomato." 

Josh and Sam clenched their teeth. Josh was the first one to speak. "I'm an apple, Toby!...An apple!" 

Sam's delayed and equally lame response came next. "I don't look like a bird!" 

Toby grinned. "Oh you don't...Robin?" 

Sam's eyes fell to the floor. "Okay, so I have a bird name, but..." 

"And a feather in your cap, " C.J. interjected. 

Sam was at a loss for a rebuttal, so he blurted out a weak, childish comeback. "Oh yeah...Well, at least I don't look like a stupid, mean clown and a big, tall red crayon!" 

Toby laughed at Sam's simplistic and infantile comeback, as Josh rolled his eyes. Toby spoke. "Oh, you got me there, Sam...Put me right in my place...Now I'm too scared to give you a wedgie and steal your lunch money." 

Sam huffed and then walked away in frustration. Josh smiled at C.J. and Toby and spoke softly. "He does have the coolest costume, you know." 

C.J. nodded, while folding her arms across her chest. "I know, that's why we hate him." 

Toby nodded in agreement and responded with annoyance. "And why we must mock him relentlessly." 

Josh laughed, while shaking his head. 

* * * * * * 

Mallory and Donna took their seats at a table. Sam was now talking to his assistant, Kathy, across the room from them and Josh was conversing with Toby. Mallory noticed that Donna's eyes hadn't left Josh's figure. 

"He's a great guy," Mallory said, causing Donna to turn to look at her. 

Donna responded with a slight smile. "Yeah, Sam is." 

"Not Sam...I mean, yes, Sam is a great guy, but that's not who I was talking about," Mallory clarified. 

Donna looked at her in confusion. "Then who did you mean?" 

Mallory smiled. "Josh, of course." 

Donna nodded, a little surprised. "Yeah, Josh can be great...Sometimes...When he isn't wrapped up in his little Josh world." 

Mallory smiled softly at her. "I see the way he looks at you." 

Donna's eyes widened at her. "What do you mean?" 

"I mean that sometimes I can see in his eyes that his world revolves around you." Mallory stated with a grin. 

Donna tried her best to laugh Mallory off, but the words still struck her. "Mallory, you have a very active imagination. Josh feels nothing like that for me...I can tell." 

Mallory shook her head. "Let me guess...When you asked him how you looked in your costume, he got all tongue tied and said something stupid, right?" 

Donna's eyebrows peaked and she nodded. "Yeah, how did you know that?" 

Mallory smiled. "Because guys always say something stupid when a woman takes their breath away...I should know, I'm dating Sam." 

Donna laughed, while Mallory's words dug deeper into her head. "I just don't know." 

Mallory grinned and patted her hand. "Well, I do." 

* * * * * * 

C.J. was standing by herself at the buffet table, scooping a chip into some vegetable dip. She was counting down the minutes until this party was over because she was having a horrible time. Suddenly, she was startled by a voice that came from behind her. 

"I was right...Red crayons are the sexiest of them all." 

C.J. turned around to face Danny. She had just finished stuffing a chip into her mouth and some of the dip was now hanging from her lip without her knowledge. She smiled flirtatiously at him. She figured that she might as well throw caution to the wind that night and blatantly flirt right back at him. 

"Oh you think so, do you?" 

"C.J-..." Danny tried to interrupt. 

"I think you may be right, Danny." C.J. grinned. 

"C.J., you have-..." 

"For the first time, you just might be right," C.J said, while coming closer to him. 

"C.J.!" Danny practically screamed, finally halting her speech. He spoke softly now and gestured to her lip. "Red crayons maybe sexy, but *that* is not." 

C.J. lifted her fingers to her mouth and wiped at them, as she shook her head in embarrassment. 

"That's what I get for trying to flirt back at you." 

Danny smiled at her. "Don't let that stop you from giving it another go." 

C.J. shook her head at him. "Oh, no. For my sake, it's better if you keep throwing yourself at me and I keep shooting you down." 

"That doesn't mean we have to stop those impromptu kisses you're so fond of giving me though, does it?" Danny asked innocently. 

C.J. smiled and shook her head. "No, those can stay." 

Danny grinned and nodded happily. It was at this point that C.J. really noticed his costume. He was wearing the same costume as she was, except in yellow. 

C.J. sighed. "I thought you said you were going to be a Burnt Sienna." 

"Changed my mind...The Burnt Sienna didn't bring out the color of my eyes." 

C.J. laughed, as she shook her head at him. "Why yellow then?" 

Danny smiled. "Well, I figured with you being red and me being yellow, we could maybe 'mix together' sometime and make orange." 

C.J. chuckled at him. "Oh, Danny, you really know how to woo a girl." 

Danny nodded and whispered into her ear. "And that's without even trying." 

C.J. swallowed hard, as Danny's lips tickled her ear lobe. She spoke nervously. "Drink...I need a drink...Preferably an alcoholic one." 

With that, C.J. left the side of a grinning Danny. 

* * * * * * 

President and Mrs. Bartlet stood outside the dining room about to enter. Abbey was adjusting a part of his costume. 

"Jed, stop moving," Abbey demanded in irritation. 

"Oh, Abbey, why did you have to make me wear this ridiculous costume?" The President whined. 

Abbey smiled at him, "It's your punishment." 

"I'm the President of the United States, it won't look very appropriate," he countered. 

"It wasn't appropriate to order your loyal, hardworking staff to attend this party, but you did it anyway, Jed." 

"But-.." He tried to interject. 

"It wasn't appropriate to assign them embarrassing costumes and force them to wear them, but you, my dear, did it anyway." Abbey stated. 

The President sighed. "The fact that I am President and can do almost anything I want within reason holds no water with you, does it?" 

Abbey grinned, while touching his cheek lightly. "No, it doesn't. Just be thankful that I am here to put you in your place whenever need be. If I weren't, only God knows what you'd have those poor people doing. You'd probably have them walking around the West Wing on stilts, while juggling knives." 

Bartlet's face brightened, a smile now occupying his lips. "Now *that* is a good idea...*That* is inspired." 

Abbey shook her head at him, as she grabbed his hand and led him into the room. 

* * * * * 

The guests rose to their feet and turned their attention to the President and First Lady as they entered. They were surprised by the President's costume, but they did their best not to let it show. 

The President waved at them and gestured for them to be seated. "The First Lady and I would just like to thank you all for coming tonight. I know some of you would rather be other places, doing other things, but I am glad to have you here with us. Please, relax and have fun...You all deserve it." 

The group gave him a quick round of applause, before beginning to mingle. The President and First Lady began to walk over to a table that seated C.J., Toby, Leo, Sam, Josh, Donna and Mallory. 

Sam elbowed Josh as he approached. "Do you have any idea why he's wearing what he's wearing?" 

Josh whispered his reply. "No, but I'm willing to bet that Abbey had something to do with it." 

The President and Mrs. Bartlet finally reached them and he smiled at them all. "Ah, I see you're all here. Now I can save that candy corn lesson for next year." 

They all chuckled lightly. Bartlet looked at Leo, a grin upon his face. "And you seem to have assumed the role of puppy quite nicely, Leo." 

Leo smiled insincerely at him. "Yes, sir, I have. How can I ever thank you for this opportunity?" 

The President smiled. "Not shedding on the carpet will suffice, Leo." 

They all laughed and then an uncomfortable silence fell between them. Josh's hesitant voice broke it. "Sir...um I...speaking on the behalf....I was just wondering...why are you dressed like..um-..." 

The President smiled at him. "Like a fairy, Josh?" 

"Yes, sir," he responded. 

The President gestured to Abbey. "That would be the doing of my lovely wife." 

Josh and Sam exchanged knowing glances. The rest of the staff perused him more closely. President Bartlet was dressed in a pink silk top and a flower petal shaped skirt, that glittered with a silvery sheen. On his legs, he wore pale pink tights and slippers made of a slightly darker shade. A blonde curly wig sat atop his head, with a small rhinestone crown on top of it. In his hand, he held a long wand with a silver star at its end. 

Toby struggled to maintain his composure, as he asked his question. "Would you mind if I asked why?...Not that I don't think you look smashing, sir." 

Abbey responded to the question, with a smile on her lips. "It's his punishment. He has the power to force you all to do embarrassing things and I have that same power over him." 

The group smiled and laughed at the First Lady's actions. Leo spoke to her. "I think I am speaking on behalf of all of us when I say, thank you, Abbey." 

The rest of the staff echoed his sentiments. The President smiled slightly and held his hand up. "Before you all go canonizing her as a saint, remember who you work for." 

Abbey smiled and shook her head at him. "And you remember whose bed you sleep in." 

The President smiled, a chuckle following out of his mouth. He spoke to the staff. "She gets me with that one every time...I don't have a leg to stand on." 

The staff laughed, as the President and First Lady turned on their heels and headed across the room. 

C.J. smiled at them and said, "Seeing the President like that makes this all worthwhile." 

Toby grinned and commented, "Seeing the President like that makes my *life* worthwhile." 

The others nodded in agreement, laughs emerging from their mouths. 

************ 

Sam and Mallory were dancing on the wood floor at the center of the dining room, when Leo suddenly appeared at their side. 

"May I cut in?" He asked. 

Sam reluctantly stepped away and began to hand Mallory over to her father, when Leo shook his head. "Actually, it's you, Sam, that I'd like to spend a little quality time with." 

Sam and Mallory's eyes widened in surprise at Leo. Sam spoke, "Me?...You want to dance with me?" 

Mallory's eyes narrowed. "Dad, if this is some strange plan of yours to bully Sam into another Birthday message writing-..." 

Leo stopped her sentence. "Mal, it's nothing like that. Can't a father talk to the man his daughter's dating without it being deemed sinister?" 

Mallory nodded, her tone suspicious. "Talk, yes. But dance?" 

Leo shrugged and gestured to his costume. "What can I say? The President has opened my mind to a variety of new ideas." 

Mallory slowly relented and spoke sternly to her father, "Be nice, Dad." She then turned around and walked away. 

Sam hesitantly took Leo's hand and they stood as far away from each other as possible. Sam swallowed hard and asked, "This is solely for the purpose of you threatening me and me not being able to run away, correct?" 

Leo grinned and nodded, his grip tightening on Sam's hand. "Bingo." 

Sam nodded his head and spoke nervously. "Well...I don't mind admitting that this is a most uncomfortable situation." 

"It's no walk in the park for me either, Sam...For one, you keep stepping on my toes," Leo responded. 

Sam took yet another step back. "Well...um...what did you want to talk to me about?" 

"I would like to ask you some questions regarding Mallory," Leo replied. 

"Okay." 

"Do you care about my daughter, Sam?" 

"Very much." Sam said. 

"Would you ever consider hurting her?" 

Sam spoke cautiously. "Not intentionally." 

"Wrong answer," Leo declared. 

"There are wrong answers?" Sam asked, his voice cracking. 

Leo grinned at him. "There are when it comes to my daughter." 

"Oh," Sam uttered softly. 

"Listen to me, Sam." 

"Yes?" 

"My daughter is the best thing in my life, the best thing to ever happen to me. When she's happy, I'm happy. When she's unhappy, I'm unhappy. If *you* make *her* unhappy, then *you* make *me* unhappy and then *I* make *you* unhappy...Got it?" Leo said, a grin upon his face. 

Sam nodded slowly, as he lifted his hand with Leo's to wipe at his brow. "Yes, I think I do...Happy Mallory, good...Unhappy Mallory, bad." 

"That's right," Leo said. 

Sam nodded. "Okay, okay, good...I'm glad we had this talk, Leo." 

Leo smiled. "So am I, Sam." 

* * * * * 

At the edge of the dance floor, sat Donna and Josh at their table. They were watching Sam and Leo. 

Josh smiled. "I've always been rooting for those two crazy kids to get together." 

Donna laughed and shook her head. "What are the chances that Sam is not being read the riot act by Leo about Mallory right now?" 

"Slim to none," Josh replied, with a smile. 

A comfortable silence had fallen between them, when Josh broke it with a nervous question. "Um...Donna, would you maybe possibly want to consider dancing with me?" 

Donna smiled at the awkwardness with which Josh had phrased the question. "I'd love, too," she replied. 

Josh smiled in relief and took her hand. They walked to where Leo and Sam still danced. Josh grinned at Leo. "You're one lucky guy, Leo...I hear Sam's one helluva kisser." 

Leo scowled at him. Josh smiled slightly, "You're going to make *me* talk to every lunatic group that wants funding from now until the New Year for that comment, aren't you?" 

Leo smiled and nodded, before he and Sam separated and walked away in different directions. 

Josh shrugged and turned to Donna, who was smiling at him. He stepped closer to her and attempted to take one hand in his and place the other on his shoulder. Unfortunately, Josh's bulging costume was preventing him from reaching Donna's hands, as he could not get any closer to her than two feet. 

Donna smiled and Josh ran a hand through his hair in embarrassment. "It seems I'm a little on the large side." 

Donna nodded. "I see that." 

"Any suggestions?" 

"You could try and suck it in." Donna responded. 

"Donna." Josh said, with a slight smile. "Never mind, let's just try this again." 

Josh once again came closer to Donna and tried to take her hands in his. However, his efforts were only rewarded with his plush body bumping Donna's and sending her falling to the floor. Josh's eyes widened in horror and he quickly bent down to help her up the best he could. Donna smiled at him and then burst out laughing. Josh returned her laugh and then helped her up from the floor. 

"Sorry about that, I'm not myself today...I think I'm retaining water, it's that time of month," Josh said, his humiliation laced tone betraying his grin. 

Donna laughed. "It's okay." 

Josh suddenly shook his head at her. "No, this is not okay. I would like to dance with you, Donnatella, and you would like to dance with me...I'll be right back." 

With that, Josh hurriedly left the dance floor and dining room, leaving a puzzled Donna all alone. 

* * * * * * 

Toby stood at the punch bowl, scooping some punch into his crystal glass. He turned around at the sound of a child's voice. The boy was five years old, with blonde hair falling across his fair face and a Superman costume adorning his body. Toby had noticed him before, since he was the only child present at the party. 

"Hi, Mr. Clown," the boy said with a smile. 

Toby sighed and shook his head. "I am not a clown, my name is Toby." 

"You look like a clown." 

"I'm pretending, it's Halloween." 

"Mr. Clown, can you make me some balloon animals, please?" 

Toby clenched his fists, his patience already worn out from being in this costume for far too long. "I am not a clown! My name is Toby Ziegler and I am Director of Communications for the White House! I don't make balloon animals and I generally don't talk to children!" 

"Do you have one of those small cars that twenty clowns can fit in?" The boy asked, unfazed. 

Toby shook his head, speaking through gritted teeth. "No, I have a medium-size car, called a BMW, that five clowns, called politicians, can fit in." 

"Can you juggle?" 

"NO! No, I cannot juggle! Listen to me carefully, you glue-eating mongrel: I am NOT a real clown! I am pretending, it's Halloween! You're dressed like Superman, but you're not *really* Superman, right?" 

"Yes, I am," the boy replied. 

Toby ran a hand down his face. "Well, I am a fake clown, so you're just going to have to accept that, along with the fact that you'll probably need braces." 

"My mom told me that all of the clowns at the circus are real, so you must be, too." 

Toby shook his head, the last of his patience gone. He knelt down to the boy and spoke to him quickly. "Your mom lied to you. That's what parents do, they lie. You might as well learn this now, so you don't end up a disturbed, bitter teenager later. Your whole life, your mom's been lying to you. The Tooth Fairy? Nope, doesn't exist. Did you really think that a tiny fairy could lug around all of that money and still be willing to exchange it for teeth? Come on, if that were possible, I'd be knockin' out my own teeth right now. The Easter Bunny? Sorry, not real. I don't know about you, but I've never seen a 5 foot bunny before, never mind one carrying around a basket of eggs and, if I did, I'd run the other way. Then there's the beloved, revered Santa Claus...Hate to tell you, but there's no such thing. He's just a myth that fat, old guys made up to help themselves feel better and look good...Okay, so now you know...And trust me, you're better off for it...I'm not real and neither is any of this other stuff that your mom and society's been stuffing down your throat since you popped out of the womb." 

The boy's eyes widened and Toby waited for the first tear to fall. He didn't want to make the kid cry, but he had just kind of exploded. Toby waited, but all the kid did was smile, laugh and then grab onto Toby's right leg. 

"What are you doing?!" Toby screamed, "You should be crying right now, throwing a tantrum. I just shattered all of your childhood delusions in less than a minute!" 

The kid smiled and tightened his grip on Toby's leg by wrapping his own legs around it. "I know you were just pretending...You just said all of that stuff to make me laugh. That's what clowns do!" 

Toby threw his head back and closed his eyes, a long sigh following out of his mouth. He muttered grumpily. "If he wasn't the President, he'd be in serious danger for making me go through this." 

Toby bent slightly and tried desperately to pull the kid off of his leg. He halted his futile attempts when he heard the First Lady's voice. "Oh, Toby, I see you've met my niece's son. He's staying with us for a few days." 

Toby attempted a smile. "Yes, Abbey, I have. We've become very close." 

Abbey smiled knowingly. "Yes, I can see that. He seems to be very attached to you." 

Toby grinned, "I can have that kind of effect on children...But I really think he should run along and mingle with the other guests, don't you? I wouldn't want to have all of the fun." 

Abbey tried her best to hide her grin. "Oh, I don't know. I think he seems very comfortable right where he is. Don't you, Bryan?" 

Bryan smiled and nodded. Abbey continued, "See? He really likes you...I'm sure the other guests won't mind if you two spend a little more time together." 

Toby managed a slight smile. "Thank you, Abbey." 

The First Lady nodded and then turned around to walk away. Toby looked down at the child and spoke sternly. "Look, you little leech, if you don't get off of me right now, I'm going to get the jaws of life and make you get off!" 

The boy smiled and only tightened his hold. Just then, Sam walked by and grinned at Toby. He gestured to the boy. "Ah, finally playing nice with the other kids, huh, Toby?" 

Toby rewarded Sam with what can only be described as a growl. He then lifted his floppy shoe and brought it down on Sam's right foot. Sam yelped in pain, then proceeded to jump up and down on the uninjured foot, as his hands attempted to rub the other one. 

Toby smiled and looked down at the little boy. "Now *that* guy is a clown. See how he makes us all laugh?" The boy nodded, his body still clinging to Toby's leg. 

* * * * * * 

Sam slowly limped to the table where Mallory sat. She stood up worriedly and helped him sit down. "What happened to you? My Dad didn't do this, did he?" 

Sam shook his head, as he placed his foot up on the table and began to rub it. He winced in pain and then spoke in a bitter tone, "No, no, Leo didn't do this. This was the work of a disgruntled clown's floppy foot." 

Mallory bit her lip to keep from laughing. She rubbed at his back and then watched as he lowered his foot back onto the floor. Sam then placed his head down on top of the table in dramatic fashion. Mallory smiled and touched his arm. "I'm sorry about your foot...But what did my father say to you?" 

Sam lifted his head and shrugged. "I'm not entirely sure. He confused me with the frequent use of the word unhappy." 

Mallory grinned. "I'm sorry, Sam. He does mean well." 

Sam nodded and held his index finger up. "Although I will say this, your father is quite the dancer." 

Mallory laughed, while linking her fingers with his. "Yeah, he's not bad...Did anything else happen between you two that I should know about?" 

Sam smiled at her. "I can't be sure, but I *think* we may be engaged now." 

Mallory laughed and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Well, just as long as he knows that I'm not letting you go without a fight." 

Sam grinned and tried to speak dreamily, "You might not have a choice there, Mal. Your father's twinkle toes, coupled with the way he makes me feel as light as a feather while we dance, may be enough to send me running right into his arms." 

Mallory chuckled, while lightly swatting his arm. "Just remember, my father doesn't have a nurse's costume." 

Sam spoke with a well-hidden smile. "True, but that puppy costume does hold a certain amount of appeal." 

Mallory laughed again, before pulling his face to hers in a kiss. 

* * * * * * 

Danny sat down next to C.J. at her table. "Would you mind if I call you 'Red' from now on?" 

"Yes, I would mind, Danny." 

"I'll let you call me 'Yellow'." 

"No, thank you." 

"How about if I only call you it during the press briefings when I ask you a question?" 

"That's a definite no." 

"Come on, C.J...It'll be my cute little nickname for you...It's catchy." 

C.J. turned to face him for the first time. "No, Danny, I don't want you calling me Red or any other nickname for that matter." 

"You know, I might just give up on you one day and then you'll be sorry." 

"Can I get that in writing?" 

"Luckily for you, I'm a glutton for punishment." 

"Oh yes, Lucky me," C.J. responded with a smile. 

"Can I get one of those kisses now?" 

"No." 

"Why?" 

"Because I don't want to encourage begging." 

"I've been begging you for a date for how long and you just now figured out that kissing me spontaneously encourages begging?" Danny asked. 

"I can be extremely slow." C.J. replied. 

"It's not because I ate the onion dip, is it?" 

"No." 

"Because I had a mint, you know." 

"It's not the because of the dip, Danny." 

"Okay." Danny paused and then asked. '"Is it because you want to come up to me and grab me by the crayon wrapper when I least expect it, like you usually do?" 

C.J. responded dryly. "Yes, Danny, that's it...I relish the element of surprise." 

"Okay." 

"Will you go away now?" 

"Yeah...You're sure it's not the dip, right." 

"It's not the dip, Danny." 

"Okay." 

"Good-bye." 

"Bye, Red." 

C.J. smiled and then shook her head at what she was about to do. For some reason, that 'nickname', coming out of his mouth, had just sent chills running up and down her spine. She got up, walked over to him and then pressed her lips to his in a kiss. Danny eagerly returned it and then smiled at her as they separated. 

"I too relish the element of surprise," he said. 

"Good, go away now," C.J replied. 

"One more for the road?" Danny asked. 

"No." 

"Okay." 

"Good-bye, Danny." 

"Good-bye, Red," Danny responded. 

C.J. smiled widely, as she watched his figure walk away. 

* * * * * * 

A few minutes later, Josh walked back into the room and grabbed Donna by the hand. Donna was surprised to see what he was wearing. She whispered to him. "Josh, what are you doing in here wearing only that?" 

Josh smiled and shrugged. He was wearing nothing more than a tank top undershirt and a pair of plaid, wool boxers. "I promised you a dance." 

Donna's eyes widened and she spoke through clenched teeth. "Yes, but I'd prefer it if you were fully clothed first, thank you...Why are you doing this? Aren't you afraid of being humiliated?" 

Josh smiled and said softly, "I wanted to dance with you...That's the only thing I was thinking about." 

Donna smiled, his words touching her. She slowly accepted his hand and allowed herself to be led onto the floor. Josh drew her closer to him, until her head rested on his shoulder. Donna spoke again. "I still can't believe that you're not embarrassed." 

Josh grinned. "Oh, I am...But I was already embarrassed anyway, so I figured why not go all out...Plus, like you said, I lost my dignity long ago." 

Donna smiled and then pulled away slightly to look up at him. "This was really sweet...Strange, but sweet." 

Josh smiled and then said softly. "I forgot to tell you something earlier...You look beautiful." 

Donna's breath caught in her chest slightly and then she replied, "Thank you...First 'glisteny' and now beautiful...What more could a girl ask for?" 

Josh smiled, before slowly lowering his lips to a surprised Donna. He gave her a quick, yet soft kiss and then said, "How about that?" 

Donna nodded, speechless from what had just happened. She then simply smiled and placed her head back onto his shoulder. Josh grinned gratefully and then tilted his face so that his cheek touched her forehead. 

* * * * * * 

An hour or so later, the President was requesting the guests' attention. He gathered the Senior Staff close to him and began. 

"As I am sure you are all aware, my staff was ordered to attend this party wearing these costumes. Now, I know many of you thought that was very selfish and arrogant of me. And you are partly right. I did do it for my own entertainment, but, as you can see, I've paid dearly for that." 

The President glanced at his wife and smiled. He then turned back to the guests. 

"However, I have reasons that go beyond personal amusement. I wanted to invite these people, these people who are like family, to a party where they could have fun...Where they could forget about all of the rules and standards that they must conform to everyday and just let loose. Of course, knowing them as I do, I was aware they'd need my help doing so. That's why I assigned the costumes. But I also assigned the costumes to each one of you for a specific reason." 

The President was now addressing the Senior Staff specifically. "Now, this is probably going to get pretty corny and sentimental in parts, so you've been warned." 

Soft chuckles spread throughout the crowd and then quieted as the President continued. "Sam, I picked Robin Hood for you because of your giving spirit. You're always willing to help those less fortunate, no matter how ill-advised, and you always look for the best in everyone...Of course, I also wanted to see you in tights, but I digress." 

The crowd erupted in laughter, as Sam smiled and nodded a silent 'thank you' to the President. Mallory smiled proudly at Sam and placed her hand in his. 

The President then continued. "C.J., I picked you to be a crayon because I think that you have an uncanny ability to brighten every situation and paint it in a better light. You have a very difficult job, but you handle it with a creativity and radiance that always shows and makes a world of difference." 

C.J. placed her head down, blushing at the President's comments. When she raised her head again, their eyes met and she gave him a grateful nod. She caught Danny's eyes as she left the President's. He gave her a wink and a grin, causing C.J's cheeks to increase in redness and helping to solidify her new nickname. 

The President when on, "Josh, I chose you to be an apple because I know you don't like them...And, more importantly, because I think it represents you perfectly. An apple has a tough skin and you have an attitude that can be brash and off-putting...And that's good, we need that in this business. But just like with an apple, once you peel away that skin, you find something sweet and worth the work it took to reveal it...You're a wonderful blend of both, Josh, never lose that." 

Josh smiled, as he took Donna's hand in his. He mouthed a silent 'thank you' to the President. 

The President continued, "Toby, I chose you to be a clown because, quite frankly, I knew it would piss you off." 

The guests laughed out loud and Toby nodded with a caustic smirk. The President went on, "I also wanted you to know that your sense of humor, as pessimistic and cynical as it can be, makes me smile each and everyday...I hope that clown costume made you realize that your humor can get you through anything and that every once in a while it's okay to laugh at yourself." 

Toby looked down at the child still attached to his leg and smiled. Then he met the President's eyes and no words needed to pass between them. 

The President's gaze now fell upon Leo and he smiled at him, speaking in a gentle, caring tone. 

"And, Leo, I chose you to be a puppy for a reason I knew you would not realize...A dog is said to be a man's best friend and you are mine. They are loyal and comforting, and I can think of no better way to describe you...You have been there for me when I needed you the most, always giving me what I required even when I didn't know what that was. You offer me words, when I think I need silence and silence, when I think I need words; you know me better than I know myself sometimes...You are always honest with me, you never tell me what to do, you let me figure it out on my own. You are the person whose words I will always heed and whose loyalty and friendship will always be an honor to have." 

The guests broke into a long, thunderous round of applause. 

Once they'd quieted, Leo met the President's eyes. Despite his attempts to stifle his emotions, his voice cracked as he spoke, "I think I speak for all of us, sir, when I say thank you and it will always be our honor to serve at the pleasure of the President." 

The President nodded, as an appreciation shone in his eyes and played across his lips...The same could be seen in the eyes and on the lips of the people he considered family who surrounded him. 

THE END 


End file.
